Overcome the crisis of middle age without problems

The fact that the crisis of middle age is not always a painless period blows a lot of popular psychological publications. But serious science does not always agree with such a "negativistic" point of view. Yes, the time of a mid-life crisis is a period of rethinking your life and the path that you have gone through, which is not always pleasant;Some goals have been achieved, some have been abandoned, many dreams may now seem unrealizable, but. .. does active life end there? De facto this is not so. In today's realities, this crisis is more a calm rethinking of oneself in this world than peak experiences and depressive symptoms. However, they also have a place to be: how can we smooth out this period and derive maximum benefit from it? Let's think about it.

Take

sports do not have to bump up sharply in weightlifting or start preparing for the ski marathon. Learn to listen to your body, feel what it lacks? Any sports chaenya will be useful both physically and psychologically. First, the body tone will be corny, which is important - the physiological state affects the emotional sphere, exactly, as the psyche affects the somatics. In addition, a small, but regular morning exercise will be a good prevention for "seasonal" diseases.

Secondly, metered loads stimulate the release of norepinephrine and endorphin in the body - this explains the satisfaction after training. By the way, not so long ago, psycho-physiologists have found that banal flexibility exercises( stretching) give greater gain "happiness" hormones, rather than heavy sports. Why not stretch and support your body and your emotional resources?- Sports, this is a way to reload your state and get rid of the uninformed emotions.

Fig.1 - Sport, as a measure of overcoming the crisis, improves overall health and mood.

So, the first advice - do your body and it will smooth even the unpleasant manifestations of the crisis age.

delve into family

Known in psychology fact: the family - is the most contentious group. .. and the most reliable support when the world around the storm broke. So why not use this resource? It's not for nothing that age is called "second youth" by the age of 40.Look in a new light on what your children are interested in, perhaps this "something" will carry you so much that a new hobby is born. In addition, sincere interest will help to establish a warm relationship between all members of the family, which will create a zone of comfort, in which you can always with confidence dip in moments of adversity.

Secondly, no one says that a mid-life crisis reduces the ability and desire to learn something new. Spending time with your family, you will once again understand what different views can be on life - and this after so many years of living together! And sometimes these positions are extremely interesting, maybe they will become the leaders in the next segment of life?

Fig.2 - Good family relationships remain the strongest ally in the fight against crises.

So, the second tip - look towards your family. Once abandoned grain of trust and acceptance will return to you with family warmth, which will certainly help to survive all the vicissitudes of the middle-aged crisis.

Remember your hobbies

What did you do when you were a 20-year-old boy? What books did you like? What fascinated you? Where did it all go?- maybe this is the right time to brush off the old guitar or open Heidegger's volume? Go back to your origins. What helped you earlier, of course, will help now. In addition, the recognition of their forgotten and even seemingly strange interests is a powerful emotional support in accepting the fact that your past was damn interesting.

It is not uncommon that taking "the old" will have such incredible self-confidence that someone decides to radically change their entire rhythm of life. Our hobbies - this is another factor that helps build a positive emotional mood. In many forgotten hobbies, some sacred meaning was laid, which, once discovered, helps to see your life in vivid colors.

Refer to the art of

Aesthetic experiences are a magnificent thing, given to man by evolution. Even if you never understood the art of painting or classical music, why not try them again? Perhaps, just the time came when the picture of Aivazovsky will express that ninth shaft, which took place in your soul? Accepting that music and pictures( and other kinds of art) "feel" your experiences with you is a powerful support. After all, there can be centuries of works. And it means that not one generation ago someone understood and expressed your confusion. Art is an indicator of community, which makes it clear that even in insane joy and deep grief, you are not alone.

In addition, the crisis of middle age is a time when you want to feel and learn something completely new. And a new look at the eternal classics can just be the impetus that will push you into a new world of history, philosophy, and simply interesting stories about the life of the great.

So, the next advice is to ask for help to the eternal, because the power of art is so great that it will help to share all the unpleasant experiences that can shake you.

Re-qualify

Probably, this is our most radical advice. At some point a man can acutely feel that everything he does is not his. And at such times neither big posts nor high income are able to patch this hole of dissatisfaction with oneself. For many, the mid-life crisis is a period of change of work, sometimes forcedly, but better - voluntarily.

What would you like and could do? Maybe you've always been interested in radio engineering or genetics? Today, there are all opportunities to get a second special education, or just somehow to join the beloved sphere. Of course, changing professions and retraining is a laborious, but often very pleasant process. In particular, if the choice is made by you consciously and there is a keen interest in what you want to do.

Fig.3 - Advanced training, retraining, job change - it's all available for men at almost any age.

But, of course, do not forget about the economic stability of the family. Even when taking time for retraining, do not forget about your relatives. Your joy should not be built on the grief of others.

Instead of concluding

So, the mid-life crisis is not always depression and dissatisfaction with one's own life, although such a scenario is possible. Normally, the period of 35-40 years is characterized by a new upsurge, a rethinking of oneself and one's purpose: new goals are set, non-essential ones are discarded. The crisis of middle age is successfully completed, if even greater integration and harmony with oneself( and the world) is achieved than it was before this period. This period is a step towards the sense of value and fullness of one's life.

And briefly about the pitfalls of this period. First, there are various dependencies and at the head - alcoholization. But it will not be possible to drown the sense of own insolvency in alcohol, therefore it is necessary to search for more constructive ways of an exit from the crisis. And the main thing is not to be afraid to ask for help, because the recognition of your weakness is the biggest force and a huge step on the way to solving your problems. But if life seems completely unbearable, then why not think about a good psychotherapist?

Doctor-psychologist Borisov OB B.

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